Everyone can use a little extra support when handling life's challenges -- and one way to get it is by talking with a professional.
Before you immediately dismiss the idea, consider this: Research has shown that verbalizing feelings can have a significant therapeutic effect on the brain. In other words, getting your worries out in the open (even the "insignificant" ones) -- particularly with someone trained to help you manage them -- is a good thing for your well-being.
So, say you've decided to take the plunge and get some professional help. Should you seek out a therapist, or would a life coach benefit you more? It's important, firstly, to understand how the two differ (though regardless of the differences, or which route you go with, you're still making a choice to better your life -- and there's nothing bad about that).
Therapists, whether classified as psychologists or counselors, have varying master's and doctorate degrees and are licensed by their state. With psychotherapy, also known as talk therapy, licensed professionals focus on the long-term and work on ways to understand your thoughts, moods and behaviors.
Life coaches, on the other hand, are encouraged to obtain certification through an accredited program like the International Coaching Federation (although it's not required as the profession isn't regulated). And unlike with therapists, there are no degree requirements. Life coaches aim to motivate, offer emotional support and create confidence in their clients. Many former psychologists and counselors have gone on to become life coaches.
An article published by the American Counseling Association likens therapy and life coaching to step-siblings: sharing similar traits, but each using different approaches. Many life coaches focus on creating a new life path in order to achieve goals, whereas therapy sometimes looks into emotional resolutions to past problems in order to move forward, according to Counseling Today.
But as author and clinical psychologist Michael Bader writes, it doesn't matter how conflated the two can be -- what matters is what you get from the practice:
The biggest difference between coaching and therapy, in my view, is that the theory that guides my work as a therapist can explain how coaching does or does not work, while theories that guide coaches can't do the same about therapy. This difference, while true, seems inconsequential to me. What matters is that people get help in their efforts to grow, master their problems and become more effective in their lives.
According to David Spiegel, associate chair of psychiatry and behavioral sciences at Stanford University, anyone should be open to seeking professional guidance when it comes to their emotional health.
"We're social creatures, fundamentally, so talking to people can be a real source of support and help," Spiegel told The Huffington Post. "But it won't happen if you don't give it a try."
Here are some ways therapy or life coaching can make you happier and mentally healthier, and improve your life:
Therapy can help you handle emotions from problems or stressors, even if they aren't dramatically life-altering or traumatic.
Therapy is well-known for its problem-solving techniques and reputation as a tool for overcoming anxiety, depression and addiction. But as Spiegel explains, it's also a way to establish better emotional wellness in your daily life.
"Therapy can be an interpersonal laboratory," Spiegel said. "It's a way of working with cognition, emotion and interpersonal relationships in a way that helps you manage your emotions and learn to see it in a different perspective."
In other words, you don't have to go through a huge life event or trauma to benefit from therapy. Talking with a professional allows you to get a sense of how you appear to other people, helps you get feedback on whatever you're feeling and offers insight on how those emotions are affecting your everyday life.
Life coaches can hold you accountable for your goals.
Whether you want to lose weight or make a significant career change, talking to a professional life coach can help you get over those mental blocks you encounter with any challenge. And as New York-based life coach Stefanie Ziev explains, having someone to answer to will also hold you accountable for your progress.
"I feel like we live in a society where everybody thinks they have to do it alone," she told HuffPost. "I think we are just better together. I think the major benefit of seeking someone is that it brings you massive support and creates accountability when it comes to going after your goals."
And there's science to support this notion. Research shows that social support can help build resilience against stress -- a useful tool if you're trying to make a significant life change.
Talking with someone can help you find purpose.
When you speak to a professional, whether it be a life coach or a therapist, Ziev stresses the importance of opening yourself up to what you're struggling with and where you'd like to go from there. This allows you to work toward a goal, which can bring confidence, peace of mind and, ultimately, more meaning to life.
"This really works for people who are seeking more meaning in their lives, personally and professionally," Ziev said. "It clarifies your purpose... particularly when you're feeling depleted in life."
A professional can help you dissect a problem -- then help you figure out how to solve it.
Just as a life coach can help you formulate a plan to make a significant change in your life, therapy can help you develop a strategy to handle a current hardship you may be facing. Spiegel says that speaking with a professional allows you to look at any hill you're climbing from a new angle.
"You learn about perspective on whatever the problem is you're struggling with," Spiegel explained. "You can see the problem without feeling overwhelmed with anxiety or sadness even though the problem is still there. In that way, therapy can help you re-contextualize the problem you're dealing with in order to make a strategy to help you move forward."
Spiegel stresses the importance of doing a little research to find a licensed professional that aligns best with your situation -- and to then embrace that person with an open mind.
"There's some stigma that you feel that you don't need emotional support," he said. "You don't have to be severely mentally ill to get help. [Talking with a professional] can get you through difficult situations in life and you're stronger if you do that."
A Life Coach Isn't a Therapist, But Here's What They Do
Think of them like an action-oriented mentor who can help you reach your goals.
We all need a little help sometimes, especially when it comes to journeys of self-discovery. Whether your goal is to be more confident or to find fulfillment in a passion project, it can be pretty tough to figure out how to get from point A (identifying a goal) to point B (actually going after and achieving that goal). That's where a life coach comes in. Like a therapist, a life coach is someone who can help you identify strengths and weaknesses and overcome obstacles holding you back. But who you should see depends on your issues and what you're hoping to achieve. So here’s what you need to know before you reach out.
What Does a Life Coach do?
Well, you know what a sports coach does: They help an individual or team identify a goal (i.e. winning) and then they develop a plan for that person or group. It’s pretty straightforward—and the same holds true for life coaching.
“Life coaching focuses on what's happening right now, what a person wants next, and how that gap can be bridged,” explains certified coach Jane Scudder and founder of leadership development firm The New Exec.
Coaching is about helping people to identify the obstacles that keep getting in their way, assisting them with finding motivation, and pinpointing any resistance to change. A life coach is a broad term. You can also find business coaches, executive coaches, leadership coaches, and health coaches, but a life coach is typically most helpful when you’re thinking about your overall future.
“My work is really centered on four things,” says Scudder. “Helping someone expand an idea; helping someone understand what their present experience is with mindfulness, exploring mindsets to help someone ‘see’ options differently, and helping someone understand personal value and belief systems, and how these show up in all areas of our lives.”
It's not a life coach's role to provide advice.
A common misconception is that life coaches provide advice, says Kate Bathras, a Certified Professional Coach and member of the ICF. “It’s not a coach’s role to impart wisdom, but rather to facilitate the client's own process of connecting to their inner wisdom, and making choices about their actions and next steps from that place of connection,” she explains. In that sense, a coach is an unbiased brainstorming partner—you’re still the one doing the heavy lifting.
And how is a Life Coach different from a therapist?
Coaching can be therapeutic, but there are some major differences between life coaching and therapy. “A coach looks at your present to help you create the future you desire, while a therapist looks at your past to help you manage your present,” explains Tess Brigham, a licensed psychotherapist and board-certified coach (BCC). “So while coaching is action-oriented, therapy is insight-oriented.”
A session with a life coach will feel a lot different than one with a therapist—one provides structure and accountability while the other is more open-ended. “My coaching sessions are very directive—clients complete questionnaires to identify goals and always have homework to accomplish between sessions so I'm learning what they have or haven’t done since our last session,” says Brigham. “In therapy sessions, I let my clients decide which direction they would like to go in, and our conversation is usually determined by how they’re feeling in that moment, any insights they gained since we last met, and what people or events may have triggered their feelings.”
Life coaching sessions tend to be more direct.
You’re also not going to go to a life coach and get a diagnosis. “A licensed therapist is someone who has been trained, gained clinical hours that were supervised by professionals, and have been vetted by a board,” says Angela Kenzslowe, a clinical psychologist. “They diagnose disorders, have the skills and tools to work with traumas, and work with short-term behavioral modifications.”
That’s not to say life coaches don’t have tools and skills for specific aspects of life—but there’s no healing work, she adds. “The challenge is that there are no regulations or standard of care for life coaches. Anyone can hang a shingle and call themselves a coach,” she says. “That doesn’t mean that life coaching can’t be effective; it just means that a person must do their due diligence in vetting a life coach.” Look for ones who have received training through a certifying body such as the ICF or BCC.
Okay, so which one is right for you?
Actually, you don’t have to choose—it’s totally fine to see both. “A good rule of thumb is that if your issues are disrupting your personal or professional life, you should consider working with a therapist,” says Jacinta Jimenez, a psychologist and board-certified coach (although you don’t necessarily have to be going through a huge life event to benefit from therapy).
But “many people seek coaching after or alongside therapy, as it builds upon the healing that can take place in the therapy process,” adds Bathras.
The important thing to keep in mind is that the two shouldn’t overlap, and a life coach won't address clinical issues. “A great life coach will know the boundaries of coaching and will refer you to a therapist if and when clinical work is needed,” says Kenzslowe.
As a life coach I have help my clients achieve goals by using the fitness method. I offer my life coaching while training the body.In doing so, we work on goals, boost confidence, learn about self-love and much more!!
As a life coach I have help my clients achieve goals by using the fitness method. I offer my life coaching while training the body.In doing so, we work on goals, boost confidence, learn about self-love and much more!!